I know I have too much thought but

Today’s presentation was very interesting to me. I am very sure that we all have very different point of view about the “NAME”. Especially for me, name is very important fragment of myself from all images wrapping around me. As my mom told me, I love myself TOO MUCH (thanks mom). Second interesting thing was “Gender”

Until very recently, I thought I like my name because I am kind of narcissist, adore every part of me. That was the reason I wanted to explore myself as a content and object that I can play with. When I started my project at very first moment, wanted to choose my body as my content. It is one of most my favorite theme – human body figure line. It is most powerful visual vehicle, and vulnerable part for human. This image can represent secular, but also can be ourselves. ( If I started talk about body, I cannot finishing it, so in here I just skip it :p) But because, in my project, I always have thought myself just “moon” as a natural object. Because I exist as “moon” there was no space to think I as a woman. Many of criteria were not set because I am woman, I had a choice because it is me.

However, I was just shocked because many people when they see my body thought “woman body” before they see “moon object”. I was nearly shocked because, although I was aware of my gender thing,  I have not thought about gender matter through my project or in any circumstances.

At the first, I was angry because that gender pard was not I wanted element in my project, also, I didn’t want to choose the other person. I tried to answer myself about that unexpected result that what if I have chosen man object, people still thought “woman body” or not. It was interesting, Why organismal images are so strong? And also I realise most of the Sci-fi novel shows us, when people made a android, first thing to do was make human figure and choose either man or woman. Maybe, even if we made android which do not need to be man or woman, we are comfortable when we know what they are exactly. But, what is the body part of the man or woman? I remember, one of my classmate said the sign of neutral toilet has both man and woman figure. And I started to dip into the other dimension again. How can I represent neutral? rid of breast is neutral? or make long hair with man body is neutral?

Even if made a image with two elements from both gender, it can not be neutral gender, because it still has both gender not removed. Actually, neutral is very hard to bring to real. It is almost 4 dimension difficult. In this point, I realise, how I could I think myself neutral? and rid of such a strong image from my mind.

Is that because I do not believe traditional family composition? then, if we start to make baby without any sexual activity, can we think ourselves without gender matter? Or because I focused inside element rather than outside, I could forget that I am woman? If so, if we concentrate each one of us, not a grouped gender, can we don’t think about gender?

Maybe, it is unnecessary, worthless question. And just accept what we are. But still there is the reason why I missed gender point from my first draft. It is maybe body image, or woman image I suppose.

Ok, moon. Now you have thing to do.